The Start of Things
15 years ago
Thursday, February 11, 2010
One-Sentence Waterfall
Where the surface, smooth as glass, belied the powerful current beneath, there Louisa Lake overflowed its western shore, always pouring out but never emptying; falling, shining, and crashing over rocks, the water leapt and gleamed, a torrent of white in the shadow of old-growth cedars which scrambled all over each other for a hold in the bare rock, roots braiding and twisting like some complex Celtic interlace, as they leaned to watch the waterfall spill more than one hundred feet into Agnes Lake below.
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This sentence belongs in a novel. It is so beautiful in its description, the use of metaphor, and, my favorite, the animation of the cedar trees. That is the invention in this sentence. To describe the trees as if they were alive, "scrambling all over each other for a hold in the bare rock," makes this sentence unique. Many a composition have imagined the waterfall itself as a raging, living, current. But to put the life in the trees, and not even mention the word, "waterfall" until the end, one must read between the lines to realize the unstated subject of this sentence. This is engaging and fun for the reader. But good invention cannot come without delivery, and I believe you delivered the image beautifully. "... a torrent of white in the shadow of old-growth cedars;" "torrent of white" and "shadow" oppose each other giving many variables to the sentence and the overall imagery. Where "torrent" is loud and "white" is light, "shadow" is both quiet and dark leading the reader from one dimension to another as the sentence unfolds. The "roots braiding and twisting like some complex Celtic interlace" not only provides the reader with a pictorial design of the roots, but places the reader's mind in a foreign, "Celtic" fantasy to which to place this waterfall. And then to finish with, "as they leaned to watch", gives me, the reader, the feeling in ecstacy of leaning out over the top of the waterfall myself. One becomes the trees in the end.
ReplyDeleteI chose this sentence because it was, to me, one of the only ones that had a continuous flow to it. Whereas others seem choppy with often irrelevant clauses, this sentence was a full description of the lake with a flow of continuous creativity in its personification. For example, “the water leapt” gives a certain connotation that the crashing water has a mind of its own and can just spring from the lake at its choosing. Moreover, when the writer describes the trees, not only is it detailed and you can totally picture it in your mind, but the fact that they are described as “watching” the waterfall demonstrates the interest they have in the water and the world around them. It emphasizes all of the life around us that becomes forgotten or unseen with a connection between the environment and man.
ReplyDeleteAnother reason I chose this sentence is because, as stated before, the imagery is very specific. Though this takes place in Louisiana, it’s reminiscent of the times I have been outdoors here in the summer, and the feeling of how it overwhelms you with tranquility and modesty. Likewise it’s a reminder during this cold Wisconsin weather of the life underneath the inches of snow and ice, and a promise that this nature will be revealed once again in time.
Louisa Falls is, in fact, in Canada.
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